Death Ends a Life...Not a Relationship

Death ends a life, but it does not end a relationship.

We don’t lose love when someone dies — we lose the form it once came in.

And that is where the ache sits.

The part no one prepares you for.

But over time, we realize the relationship isn’t gone —

it’s simply asking to be carried differently.

I keep my grandma’s coffee cup not to cling to the past,

but because we shared so many beautiful conversations over that cup.

Stories, laughter, and the quiet sacred moments in between.

Now, when I see it sitting on my counter,

it reminds me to tell her about my day —

just like I always did.

The cup doesn’t freeze her in time.

It continues the relationship in a new way.

It’s a continuation.

or “move on.”

As if grief is a task to complete instead of a relationship to reshape.

I often ask my patients to stay curious:

What might it look like to move forward with the relationship,

instead of trying to leave it behind?

Because healing doesn’t mean letting go.

Healing means learning how to carry love in a different form...